Tuesday, April 13, 2010

#damnyouZucker Renews Bidet Market

Since the Kelsey Grammer and Bill Zucker Comedy Show launched, there has been great concern for Bill Zucker’s affinity for Toilet Paper, and his super evil plan to steal and hoard all the toilet paper in the world, #damnyouzucker

Forcing the world's population to conserve dwindling, hidden stashes of two ply paper (dived up now into one ply), used tissue and other bits and pieces of refuge, Zucker’s plan has had unexpected consequences for the market place – the Bidet is making a comeback.

This confused piece of hardware, part toilet - part cleansing fountain, is offering relief to many bathroom goers across the world since Zucker, aka the T-Piler, had started his dastardly quest.  Where it was once only an odd curiosity and a convenient depository to keep beer cold, the bidet is now being celebrated and branded as a "Green Solution" to the "damnyouzuker" problem,  Bidet's are flying off the shelf - well walking anyway. 

Not everyone is unhappy with Zucker's plan, as a movement has grown to get the T-Piler to diversify his operation and start hoarding feminine hygiene products.  When asked why she would suggest such a horrifying thing @rebaenrose stated:

The true is, both pads and tampons are extremely unpleasant, and if Zucker stealing TP can bring new life to the Bidet market, imagine what it can do for the the feminine hygiene market!  Stealing the worlds supply of feminine products will finally force inventors to come up with something better - something more pleasant.  If this works, I am going to suggest that Zucker also steals bras, because we all know how horrible they can feel after 8 hours of use!




5 comments:

  1. I dont know how green bidets are. Think how much water they use. Toilet paper can be made from recycled materials, or could even be recycled itself (although, well, eww).

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  2. Hey, this is not related to the post, but do you have access to the Rev. Gisher's site?

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  3. Hi Dave, No. It looks like the Good Rev. has gone private! Invite?! Doesn't sound like him. When was the last time you talked to him? In case you do not get this, I will also post on your site. R

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  4. It's been a year or more since he's been available. Dunno why the change. I'd e-mail him, but I lost his address, and no one (that I've asked) knows what's up with him. Last I knew, he was talking about re-entering the lobbying business, but I dunno what happened after that, and while I once knew his real name - the same as a Florida sportscaster, David something with a "w" - I've since forgotten it, so I cant google him.

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