Tuesday, April 07, 2009

Mom, I Finally Get It - Evil Wrinkle Commercials

I remember when my mom, just about my age, went on a crusade against TV - particularly commercials. Out of nowhere she started to yell about the TV not being muted during commercials: "Will you mute that goddamn thing please?" Certainly, one can argue that a person's tolerance for commercials, ads, and being "sold at" (rather than "to") lowers as you get older. No longer can I easily forgive bad commercials for taking up my valuable time. There is also my resentment towards spammers on the internet, and my inbox, as well as my snail mail box is now legendary at my house. But I realized the other day that my resentment and tolerance is not the reason I yelled at my husband the other day to: "mute that goddamn thing please!" It was because of a commercial, to be sure, but not any commercial - a commercial about wrinkles. You know the one with Sarah Jessica Parker who has been airbrushed to hell and selling cream that will fill in those deep aging lines around your face (BTW, I saw her during awards ceremonies this year, and contrary to the commercials the woman DOES have wrinkles damnit). Parker calls the wrinkle creams "retard ageing" moisturizers, but I call them scams-money suckers and lairs (yeah I've used the crap as well -expensive to cheap and they are all bullshit). These commercials are nothing more than hellish banging on my ears and destroyers of my emotional well being. I am now my mother - I get it: "will you please mute that thing?!" It was around the same time that my mom also started asking me the question: "do I need a face lift yet?" - I'm finally getting this too. It's not that I mind aging all that much--god knows there is little I can do about it, and there are benefits - I am wiser, sharper, quicker in mind (if not in body). I get things more now and unlike my youth, I finally realize that I do not know "shit." Regardless, getting older is hard because of the society I (and you dear reader) live in. I am told constantly that I am now getting old, and so not as relevant. Guys, although they get this aging pressure, they do not (as well) get it because when guys gray and wrinkle - there is the rhetoric of "distinguished." Men might hate that term for the connotations of age, but at least its not: "damn, is that bitch looking old or what?!" Women get old, which is why you do not see hair coloring commercials suggest that you keep a bit of gray in your hair for women (this is the men's hair color commercials). For women, you get "full gray coverage." Hence, men get "distinguished" and women "old." So, I must apologize to my mom (may she rest in peace) for my bitchy attitude of me not understanding why she wanted me to mute the damn commercials all the time - I finally get it and I mute the damn box myself. R

2 comments:

  1. The problem is not getting wrinkles, the problem is the idea that 18-year olds are the pinacle of beauty. Puh-lease.

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  2. Oh yes, the same old-same old "men look better than women when they age" and what makes me sick is that I hear WOMEN saying this! So wrong, but what better proof of the ways in which we are brainwashed to hate ourselves? Commercials are just a way of further fueling the fires of self-hate and boy, do we tend to fall for them! I am trying not to. I have given up on trying to hide the gray and the lines. I actually like them!

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